Unenthusiastic mother reevaluates life while feeding overly enthusiastic child

The unenthusiastic mother feeding her overly enthusiastic child at Fultano's Pizza.

An area mother was spotted reevaluating her life while feeding her child today, local sources report.

The mother, who asked that she not be named in this article, is pictured in the photograph to the left, and resides in the 500 block of Alameda Avenue.

When asked as to what could have produced such a surge of reflection and regret, the mother simply stated that her child is a "wild, scathing, unstoppable animal" and that she would "stop at nothing to destroy him once and for all."